Decennalia

An expanded shot of the blog's banner, a gargoyle of the Chrysler Building overlooking Manhattan

It’s January 30, 2025. A special date for this blog, as it marks the ten year anniversary of its launch. I’m a melancholic sort who often ponders the meaning of life and how short mine is, but as I reflect on the past decade I feel good about the work I’ve done here. Sure, for half of it I didn’t really make any posts, and some days my college years feel so very long ago. But it’s only been ten years since I was a sophomore! That’s not so much time, right? I’m still young… right?

Reading through my blog posts for the first time in a decade or so, I’m struck by how little my writing seems to have changed. Sure, I’ve got more life experience than the already-jaded college student who started this blog, but I feel my outlook on life and sarcastic writing style remains the same. I find myself not cringing at my younger self’s thoughts and opinions, a true luxury these days in a post-social media world. I think I might even have gotten along with past me, something else I imagine few can say. Sure, he could be an insensitive fool at times but that’s true of 2025 Ross as well, so… Can’t fault him too much for that.

But maybe ten years really is a long time. And maybe when something has lived that long, it’s time for a change. This blog has maintained its simple, Art Deco appearance for all of those years, and I feel like it deserves an update if I’m going to continue pouring creative effort into it. And thus, I have begun giving this site a fresh coat of paint, something that I hope will evolve it into an enhanced visual experience and submersion in the 20th century style and feel I want this blog to evoke. You may have also noticed the site has its own domain, no more .wordpress.com! For a year, anyway. Domains + hosting are expensive.

To honor that style I’ve loved for so long, let’s take a short journey through the architectural masterpiece that inspired my young, creative brain to the point where it has become a constant fixture in my mind as much as it is one on the New York City skyline: The Chrysler Building.

Now much has been said about this piece of art, so instead of writing a long history of the architect, the installation, and the broader details of what make it so brilliant (should be obvious), I’m just going to share some interesting facts and cool things I’ve gleaned over the years. The images are almost entirely from an amazing book I’d love a hardcover of – The Chrysler Building: Creating a New York Icon, Day by Day. Lots of cool shots of the building during its construction, which were almost lost to history when the author accidentally stumbled upon them as they were about to be destroyed.

Construction up to the 36th floor – July 12, 1929

Firstly, I’ll share something that came to my knowledge recently. On the 71st floor of the Chrysler Building was a public observation deck which – though closed since 1945, was a marvel of modern design. A gallery called “The Celestial” had breathtaking, one-of-a-kind solar system adornments and a spacefaring vibe that would have absolutely made the feeling of looking across the blossoming Manhattan skyline something truly resplendent.

Gorgeous stuff – if only there were more photographs of this floor. Alas, it was closed in 15 years after opening and destroyed thereafter. Now the room is taken up by some soulless corporation instead of being open to the masses. If we can’t get it back for the people, I’d settle for it being my personal penthouse at the very least.

There was also a gentlemen’s club – more accurately a “millionaire cronies of Walter Chrysler club” that, in contrast to its Art Deco exterior, was decorated with a mishmash of a more traditional look & feel. Texaco, a tenant of the building, requested that a lunch club for executives be added to the building, and thus floors 66 – 68 became a strange amalgamation of medieval, Tudor, and modern styles so it could be more palatable to the traditional old dudes who would frequent it, much to the perturbation of the architect. The Cloud Club was not as short lived as the celestial – stuff for the rich elite always has a longer lease on life – but it did finally close in 1979 due to a lack of executive interest.

Photo from NYPL Collections

You can also view a cool gallery of club images here, as it looked later in its life.

Something that might initially look silly but then become familiar, in our ongoing age of pointless extravagance and performative opulence, is this shot of the architects of several famous high-rises dressing up on stage as their own buildings. Their outfits and headwear wouldn’t be out of place on a runway in Milan in [present year], methinks.

Here you can also see a short video of the men milling about on stage, looking a mixture of amused and confused.

Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t share an incredible mini-documentary video with you. Narrated by John Malkovich, who is as big a fan of the building as I am, it is a very amusing and educational 10 minute romp. Whoever wrote it – I wouldn’t put it past the writer of some of it being Malkovich himself – has exactly the kind of sharp wit I like. Do yourself a favor and check it out – the video is screwy and repeats itself after the end, so you can close it around 10 minutes in. Enjoy!

Here’s to another decade of this blog. I have found it most entertaining to write, and I’ve learned quite a few things because of it, and we all know how much I love to learn. As I mention in my About pages, Cineri Gloria Sera Venit’s founding principle is to marry useful, interesting knowledge with a witty, entertaining presentation style. And, according to my three readers who all may or may not be related to me, I succeed in that endeavor. So why stop now?

Money Memos: Bill of the Day v2

Money Memos Logo

Hey hey hey, and welcome to another episode of Money Memos! I’ll be your host today, guiding you through a world of interesting messages scratched onto dollar bills. It’s also my first post of the year, and also my first in about four months! Man, I was lazy over winter break. But new year, new me. I’ll try to keep you guys flooded with interesting content, how does that sound? And as a special reward, I have two bills for the bill of the day. You’re welcome.

First off, we have this message which can take on a couple of different meanings.

SOMEONE out there loves you. Probably.

Looks sweet and all, right? Sure, it could be that our writer wanted each person who received this bill to have a great day and think to themselves: “yeah, that’s right! Someone loves me! I’m not destined to be lonely like I thought!” It might be just the right kind of positive message that the receiver needed to hear.

Or, the person whose hands this bill fell into could be a cynical jerk such as myself. When I saw it, I immediately thought: Ouch. “Someone loves you, sarcastic smiley face.” My (loose) interpretation: “You’re a friendless loser,  but don’t worry- I’m sure that there’s someone out there who thinks you’re alright. I guess.”  Maybe I’ve seen Mean Girls one too many times. Maybe I’m just a tool since that’s what I’d mean if I sent that to someone. Of course, I was also reminded of this scene between Anna and Hans from Disney’s Frozen:

Frozen-Ana-Hans-Gif

Zzzinggg! What a burn. I’d like to submit to the jury my case that it was indeed Hans who wrote this Money Memo. Evidence: An evil putdown compounded by a smirk. Court adjourned.

On a more positive note, the other bill I have today is much less open to interpretation. It’s far less likely to have been written by a Disney villain and more likely to have been written by a time-traveling Californian dudebro from the 90’s.

20140919_200508

Tubular, bro! I actually like this one, and not because it’s steeped in jargon that was long gone from popular parlance a decade before the bill was even printed. It’s the fact that this was written on a one dollar bill. I know this dollar might have bought four gallons of gas when the writer was a kid, or a twin pack of Duncan yo-yos to do tricks with while skateboarding at the local park, but dang. How many awesome things can you buy with a dollar in 2016? Actually I know, I Googled it. Spoiler, the answer is none. Proof:dollarSearchGif

The first article I clicked on had a picture of four 12 ounce cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon as the article header image, which I deemed to be accurate considering it was a list of things you could get for $1. However, I hoped that there were things of actual value to be purchased as well, so as not to invalidate the Money Memoer’s plea that I buy something RAD.

Considering the website that the article was written for, I wasn’t expecting much but I did expect something useful. I mean, we’re still talking the purchasing power of a single single, but c’mon. Surely it’s not totally worthless. Well Ross, you thought wrong. Apparently Business Insider’s opinion of what I should spend my dollar on includes but is not limited to: Mardi Gras beads from the dollar store (big surprise), a shampoo bottle from the dollar store (I’m seeing a pattern already), making it “rain” just a drop at your local strip club (yes, that was one of the suggestions), and buying a crappy lawn decoration for my lawn… from the dollar store. I’m pretty sure the article writer was on the point of getting fired if he didn’t publish something, anything to the website because that was the most atrociously conceptualized, worded, and edited thing I’ve ever seen, and I read a lot of Buzzfeed stories. Nevertheless, it does illustrate my point. A dollar is, effectively, worthless.

Thanks, my Cali friend! Next time try writing that on a twenty dollar bill and give it to me so I can at least pay for the gasoline to even get to the dollar store to buy some garbage. That dollar wouldn’t even pay for a garbage collector to come to my house and take away all the trash that I bought from the dollar store. Think before you make a Money Memo, hombre. Or don’t, because then I wouldn’t have any material to make fun of. Cheers!

Money Memos

If there’s one thing I see more than anything else in my day-to-day life, it’s money. Well, maybe textbooks first and money second. Nevertheless, almost every day I have thousands upon thousands of dollars running through my fingers. Sounds fun, right?

Photo Credit: Nick Ares

Not really.

Being able to fan myself with a stack of hundred dollar bills isn’t quite as awesome when they aren’t mine. That’s right folks, I may handle ten grand on any given day but unfortunately I own none of it. How can this be, you ask? Well, I work for a grocery store that believes me responsible enough to accurately count every dollar it makes in a day and bundle it all up into pretty stacks. It’s kind of like being an accountant mixed with a banker, if that accountant/banker was paid ten-times less than most accountants. So what this all means is: no rapper lifestyle for me. Also, Germ-X is my best friend.

There’s one thing that I find fascinating about this job however. Each individual dollar itself. Whether it’s a lowly Washington or a flashy C-Note, each and every bill has something in common:

It’s a Federal crime to write on them.

More specifically, title 18 chapter 17 of the United States Code section 333 states that:

“Whoever mutilates, cuts, defaces, disfigures, or perforates, or unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, or Federal Reserve bank, or the Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt unfit to be reissued, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both.”

Photo Credit: Tax Credits

Geez. And I thought the penalties for littering were bad.

I could talk for hours on title 18, which has to do with every law regarding every criminal activity ever, but that will suffice for now. I mention this law solely because it has to do with the main reason I made this post in the first place, little things I call money memos. What are they exactly? Well, allow me to elucidate with an example.

Author's Photo
Author’s Photo

I’ve collected these little works of art over the past year of working with my company’s cash. And every once in a while, I’ll come upon a piece that tells a story. These stories vary from the sweet and cute to the disturbing and horrifying. This piece could go either way. I can see a mother leaving a sweet note on her son’s lunch money, or a scary, controlling overly-attached girlfriend remind “Robert” constantly of her presence. And who wrote “stop the lies”? Stop the lie that she loves Robert? Something else? A government conspiracy? Who knows? I call these currency enigmas “money memos,” and I know it’s a catchy alliterative term, so feel free to use it in conversation, free of charge.

Each time one of these uniquely vandalized bills passes through my hands, I don’t just see a felony- I see the lives of those who decided a dollar bill was the best way to communicate their message. If you think about it, it’s kind of a weird medium. They’re already filled with text, they’re dark in color and ink doesn’t always show very well, and you don’t have much space to work with. Why choose a dollar? That is what interests me.

Though it may be a crime, these money memos are permanent little missives that get passed around to thousands of people, possibly all over the world. So many have seen them, and so many more will. What determines what a person will write on them? Do they write something with the intention of it being seen by a multitude of people? If that is the case, do they weigh what they’re about to write carefully, knowing that it will be a lasting testament to their mood in that exact moment? Will they write something beautiful? Will they write something hopeful and uplifting, inspiring all who see it?

FIVE (never give up)
Author’s Photo

Or will it be something written in a drunken stupor that caters to our more… base nature?

ONE (your ass...)
Author’s Photo

That, my friends, is the question I will always be in search of an answer for.

One thing is for sure: I don’t think I’ll ever run out of money memos in violation of Title 18, Chapter 17, Section 333 of the US Code. And I hope I never do.