Lucid Dreaming

My, It’s sure been a chilly month hasn’t it? March isn’t feeling too much like spring to me- thanks a lot, worthless month. I trusted you. Today is one of the first days it’s been above 60 degrees in what feels like a century, and I’m inclined to say “too little, too late.” But it’s not, don’t leave me, nice weather!

It’s been so cold, in fact, that layers of ice made a couple days two weeks ago quite perilous to drive in. The roads were nicely iced over, causing many businesses to close for fear that Elsa’s wrath would hit them with a renewed fury.

Ice roads of March //Photo Credit: Peter Mooney
Almost as snowy and icy as Murfreesboro was. Almost.

Sorry, had to work in at least one Frozen joke there. Never again, I assure you. Anyway, because of this Tennessee snowpocalypse,  my lovely college decided to do something positive for its students for a change and close down for a short while. In fact, it closed down the day I had a few midterm tests scheduled, allowing me a sort of early spring break that I was quite glad to take advantage of. Most of my classes are on Tuesdays and Thursdays, a schedule I enjoy because it allows me to spend the least amount of time on campus while still getting enough of my homework done on all the other days. Because the fearsome winter storm had been several days in the making, on the Tuesday of March 3rd my teachers all agreed that it would be unlikely that we’d be meeting again until the next week, the glorious week known as spring break, would be over.

This caused them to seethe with the fury of teachers scorned; threats of online quizzes and poor midterm grades reverberated around those ancient and learned halls, but they fell on deaf ears. My classmates and I were listening for one thing and one thing only: the ticking of the clock which would sound out a call to escape.

Eventually, as it always does, the time came to leave. All the students of MTSU waited breathlessly to find out if we would have to study for our midterms that were scheduled on the 5th. We received no word until 3-freaking-50 in the morning, of the next day, because that venerable institution absolutely hates closing down on days it could be making money. Nearly 4 am, but my phone was on in the hope of hearing the dulcet chime of a message telling me I had a day off intellectual labor. As it turns out, it was a good thing that my phone woke me up, because I was having some really weird borderline-nightmare dreams.

Dreams. Pretty trippy things, really. We walk around the Earth until our body can’t take it anymore, at which point it shuts down and takes several hours to completely restore our power. During that time, occasionally our brain decides to take a magical journey through its subconscious, resulting in a bizarre and often creepy outcome. Mine are pretty strange anyway, and on the night of the 4th it was no exception. Among the highlight reel of events my mind convinced me were reality was me oversleeping my midterms and failing all my classes. I think I saw a future life for myself as a hobo there too. Terrifying stuff. I woke myself up in a cold sweat, and, still hazy, scrambled to get ready for class only to find they’d been canceled. However, one interesting thing about my experience that night is that about halfway through it, and the reason I was able to wake myself up, was because it turned into a lucid dream.

Frederik van Eeden //Photo Credit: Michiel1972
The good man himself, Frederik van Eeden

What exactly are lucid dreams? We’ve all probably experienced them at one time or another, and I’m pretty sure you guys know the basics of regular dreams and how REM (rapid eye movement) sleep works. The term lucid dreaming, coined by the Dutch psychiatrist Frederik van Eeden, refers to the state of dreaming and yet knowing that you are in the dream. He’s actually a pretty interesting guy who wrote a lot on the concept of dreams, and was pretty ahead of his time on the subject. Well, really ahead, if this picture helps date him any. (Hint, late 18th century.)

I think we can all agree that dreams are pretty cool, and so could van Eeden. He was one of the early researchers of Oneirology, a way too complicated word that means the study of dreams. While van Eeden published several works on the subject, it wasn’t until the mid 1900’s that Oneirology saw many breakthroughs. After all, it’s pretty hard to measure something that you can’t see, feel, or touch, and forget about within minutes of experiencing it.

While the study of why and how we dream is an utterly fascinating subject, it would take far too long to go into it. I’ve posted an amazing video at the end of this article that explains dreams in a brilliant, concise way, but I’d like to focus on lucid dreaming. As I mentioned before, it’s a term that describes being aware that one is dreaming, and it’s also fairly rare for someone to experience. If you practice at it, it becomes easier,  but even then it can be hit or miss.

Now those of you who haven’t heard of lucid dreaming might ask “how does this happen?” Well, a website called Lucidity.com which has many articles on dreaming notes that “Lucidity usually begins in the midst of a dream when the dreamer realizes that the experience is not occurring in physical reality, but is a dream.”

A kitten dreaming of feastingon beasts and tender men //Photo Credit: Moyan Brenn
A kitten dreaming of feasting on beasts and tender men (maybe)

This is what is known as a DILD, which stands for Dream Initiated Lucid Dream. The term refers to “waking up” in a dream without actually waking up in real life. You become self aware. The other type of lucid dreaming is less exciting and is known as a WILD, or Wake Initiated Lucid Dream. It’s pretty much advanced meditation, you go straight from being awake to a WILD with no lapse of consciousness in between the two states.

DILDs are the cooler one in my opinion (though I really don’t like that acronym for some reason). As for how they occur, it’s actually kind of difficult. They can sometimes be intentionally induced through various ways that I encourage you to research if the subject interests you, but to tell the truth no one knows how to guarantee a lucid dream. More often than not, the dreams we do have make us believe that we’re doing something in real life, no matter how absurd it is, and only realize it was a dream after we’ve woke up. What further complicates successful lucid dreams is that when you realize you are dreaming, your brain instinctively goes “Whoa! What the heck is going on here?!” and snaps you out of the dream, waking you up. If you don’t though, and it does occasionally happen, you can become master (or mistress!) of your dream, and that’s awesome.

That’s pretty much why you’d want to do it too. Dreaming/REM sleep has been proven to help your memory, so why not have fun while doing it? When I manage it, I do the typical flying around, creating things from nothing, becoming a god- you know, the stuff I do in real life. Usually I wake up pretty soon after, because unfortunately the longer a person is lucid dreaming, the weaker his or her hold on their dream state becomes. Eventually they can’t take it anymore, and wake up. In the meantime though, you can dream up some pretty cool, and crazy, stuff. I especially like it when I realize I can wake up from a nightmare. Those jogging skeletons that like to chase me around haven’t come close to mugging me since I was 8 or so. No matter what though, being aware of your dream opens the door to do anything you want to. It’s kind of like a perfect version of your imagination, and it can be just as limitless.

Jetpack comic //Photo Credit: Tom Gauld
Unnecessary but funny jetpack example. Also, bonus literary joke!

Research is still being done on this fascinating subject, and there’s still so much we don’t know about dreams of any kind, lucid or not. There are many theories as to why we dream as well, but no one really knows for sure. I’ll be interested to learn more if we ever do find out, but for now I’m content with soaring through the skies with some graceful flaps of my arms. Until jetpacks are invented anyway- whiiiich I just did. In a dream. They’re just as cool as you think.

I wish I could have written more on what I’ve discovered about dreams, but I don’t want you to fall asleep until after you’ve finished reading this. As a parting gift, I leave you with this video, as promised. The guy in it does an excellent job of showing just how fascinating dreams and oneirology truly are. Now go out and dream responsibly!

Blogging 101

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.”                                                 Walter Elliot

It’ s now been several weeks since I began this blog, and even though I’ve only gotten a couple major posts under my belt, I have a new-found respect for bloggers in general. It’s not an easy task. It’s not that writing in itself is difficult, it’s more the site management. Finding suitable images, doing research, formatting my posts,  phew! It’s exhausting.

Exhausting but rewarding. I adore writing and this has been really fun. I’ve learned a lot of new things about managing a blog and also about the topics I have written about or plan to write about. This project has already paid off for me, and I’m glad of that. One thing I’d like to improve is garnering more knowledge and more interesting things to share here. That way my incessant thirst for information will be sated as well as my desire to share new things with my readers. Well, reader.

In short, I’m going to try to hold myself to a regular schedule of writing posts.  Not one that I’ll make public- because I’ll inevitably fail to meet it- but to give me more of a deadline to work with, something I definitely need.

See you [at an undetermined time]!

Ross Vs. College: A Battle to the Death

This post has all the excitement you could ever want to read about! Action*! Love**! Conspiracies***! Political intrigue****!

*math **love of money ***corporations taking my money ****No political intrigue

Close enough. Considering that my last post was all about money, it’s only fitting that my second further enumerates the respect and and appreciation I have for it. However, this will be more along the lines of how much I dislike parting from my hard-earned treasure trove of Washingtons than describing the disturbing money memos people make. Don’t worry, there will be more of those in the future.

Today I mention the sweetness of cold hard cash because there’s one thing in my life that steals it away from me at a fearful rate: college. That’s right, between the parasitic entity known as the Bursar and the horde of hooligans that call themselves “faculty,” I always have somebody taking my money for “educational purposes.” One particularly demanding scholarly program is called Pearson’s My Lab & Mastering, a devilish little online resource run by a multi-million dollar British publishing company called Pearson PLC. It’s a program that professors at any college can use to assign homework and tests, and it’s all done online instead of the classroom.

Sadly, this allows teachers to be extremely lazy. Pearson My Lab & Mastering allows them to put in little to no effort into either assigning or grading homework. It’s all taken care of by the site, and let me tell you the questions are jokes. You usually have unlimited attempts to repeat the homework questions until you get them right, and in some cases the tests too. Of course, it’s great if you don’t want to put much effort into assignments. Buuuut…

Really, my only complaint is its ridiculous price. I’ve spent upwards of $100 dollars on each one, and I usually have to get multiple ones a semester, since most of my teachers are fairly lazy slobs. I can’t condemn them too much for this, so am I. But, being your typical college student, spending money on such silly programs is almost too much to bear. Even Pearson knows this, which is why they offer a two week free trial of their service while you beg whatever loan sharks you can find for cash to pay it off. I usually make use of this option, to pretend for two weeks that I’ll get to keep my money this year.

When I signed up for my Microeconomics class on this little site, I noticed my professor had posted all the homework for the entire semester. This meant that each piece of homework and each quiz were available for me to start and submit at any time. Most professors make the homework available to the students only after they have lectured on it in class, but not mine. I had the option to do it all. Every piece. Right now if I wanted.

Ha! But that would be crazy. Why would anyone do all their homework in the first two weeks of classes?

……

The Thinker
Photo Credit: Brian Hillegas

Wait, I thought. If I did all the homework I would be assigned, right now, wouldn’t that mean that I wouldn’t have to buy the “MyEconLab” in two weeks? If all my homework was done, couldn’t I sit back and save the $65 dollar fee for the program? Sure, doing all that homework when I had no idea how to do it seemed an exhausting task, but spending that much money on three months of homework when I’d already bought way too many books was an even worse thought.

So I tried it. I tried to do all the homework early. I got pretty far, I managed to get almost half of it done actually. But the sheer amount of questions, even though I had unlimited attempts at answering them until I got them right, combined with the quizzes that I was pretty much guessing at, nearly broke me. One week in, I shelved my homework project for a later date.

All this brings us to the evening of February 5th. A night where I spend 7 PM to midnight working at the school library. Where I can, fortunately, spend hours doing homework. Hours. Coincidentally, it was the last day I had access to the free trial of Pearson’s lovable economics lab. An idea began brewing in my mind. Surely, surely I could revisit the scene of my intellectual slaughter and conquer those last 11 chapters. It really would be worth it, I told myself. So, at seven sharp, I seated myself at the computer to hammer out answers to all the questions and save myself a decent bit of dough.

2/5/15 7:06 PM: I open up the website containing my darkest economic fears. No, not my bank account. Pearson’s MyEconLab, the dragon I, as a knight of the realm, was sworn to destroy reared up before me, its eerie pale logo menacing me with its quiet watchfulness. It waited for me to make the first strike, which I did. I hovered over the “Login” button and launched a click heard ’round the world. I had begun.

The Red Dragon of Pearson
Photo Credit: Aggiorna/b316728

7:08 PM: Pearson would not take this offence lightly. Knowing that if it could hold me off until midnight it would claim victory, it launched every ounce of its electronic fire at me. It met my mouse strike with its deadly claws labeled “Start Homework for Chapter 9” and “Start Quiz for Chapter 9.” I trembled, but did not falter. Its body stretched off far into the distance, culminating in a tail of about twenty minutes long with the faint words “Start Quiz for Chapter 18” glistening on it. I sighed and went to work.

7:17 PM: Halfway through fighting Chapter 9 and its nonsensical attacks of graphs and me parrying with names of laws passed in the 1970’s, I began to worry. If it was taking this long at the start of my quest, how could I finish this beast before the clock struck 12? However, I pressed on.

7:26 PM: At last, I severed the paws of Pearson and claimed victory. My reward? A gleaming “Score: 100%” staring back at me. I immediately launched into the quiz, knowing that if I eased up on my attack I should surely fall.

7:39 PM: Ending the quiz, which even though they only contain at most ten questions are far harder since I can’t be sure I got them right, I emerged with an 80%. I accepted this paltry victory and moved on. Time was not on my side.

8:50 PM: Through hours of fierce battling I had slain four more chapters and their quizzes. The fighting was brutal. A headache awoke and slapped my brain with its iron fists. My eyes started to blur. My quiz scores were now in the 60’s. Not knowing what the material is even about can do strange things to a man’s answers. Pearson seemed as undaunted as ever. I switched to a new tactic: Do all the homework first, then come back to the quizzes and do them all in a row. Guesses or not, I needed an average of about 70% for quizzes in order to claim an overall average of +90% for my score.

Pearson's Dragon Fire
Photo Credit: fortherock

9:43 PM: My shield had long withstood the fearsome flames of Pearson’s desperation. I could tell it was on the defensive now. My new approach was making a much more satisfying dent in its armor. I renewed my attack. Two chapters remained.

10:22 PM: Pearson shot over sixty questions at me, which I speedily sliced into ribbons. I had learned shortcuts easier ways to calculate answers, and was knocking out each chapter’s homework at a rate of twenty minutes per. Finally 18 fell, and Pearson quivered before me. It slunk around me and I ran at it, burying my sword-mouse into its scales, wherein the words “Quiz for Chapter 14” shimmered and swam. Its last defenses were falling before me.

11:10 PM: This was it. The final quiz. My eyes and head throbbed, but it mattered not. I knew that though my quiz scores had barely broken the 70 percent mark for a long while, Pearson’s end was near. I began my assault on the tail. The dragon met my thrust with a parry of six questions. As a particularly mean defense, some of them required me to draw objects on a graph. Considering that every question after chapter two I was completely guessing at the answer, I did my best. fifteen minutes later, I had done it. I held Pearson’s lifeless head in my hands. The beautiful line “My overall Score: 92.1%” stared back at me. “Homework Submitted: 19/19. Quizzes Submitted: 19/19.” (18 chapters, plus a starter quiz.) Half an hour before my deadline, I had done it. I logged off and shut the computer done with a sigh. I would sleep peacefully and long that night.

Was it really worth it? The mental agony (believe me, I can’t do its terribleness justice with the printed word), the torment of finding out we didn’t even have to do all the homework modules later? Yes, that’s right. We weren’t even going to cover all the chapters, as my teacher informed the class a few days later. Oh joy.

Well, I think it was. I couldn’t have known which ones she didn’t want us to do, and since I had waited until the final day to finish it up, I didn’t exactly have the luxury of asking. The way I see it: better safe than sorry. And on the plus side: the permanent mental scars will be salved by the fact that I don’t have any homework to do in that class, at all. Ever. because I slew it all that night, that fateful night, and buried it so deep the world would never lay eyes on it again.

Pearson Tombstone
Photo Credit: John Jackson

Money Memos

If there’s one thing I see more than anything else in my day-to-day life, it’s money. Well, maybe textbooks first and money second. Nevertheless, almost every day I have thousands upon thousands of dollars running through my fingers. Sounds fun, right?

Photo Credit: Nick Ares

Not really.

Being able to fan myself with a stack of hundred dollar bills isn’t quite as awesome when they aren’t mine. That’s right folks, I may handle ten grand on any given day but unfortunately I own none of it. How can this be, you ask? Well, I work for a grocery store that believes me responsible enough to accurately count every dollar it makes in a day and bundle it all up into pretty stacks. It’s kind of like being an accountant mixed with a banker, if that accountant/banker was paid ten-times less than most accountants. So what this all means is: no rapper lifestyle for me. Also, Germ-X is my best friend.

There’s one thing that I find fascinating about this job however. Each individual dollar itself. Whether it’s a lowly Washington or a flashy C-Note, each and every bill has something in common:

It’s a Federal crime to write on them.

More specifically, title 18 chapter 17 of the United States Code section 333 states that:

“Whoever mutilates, cuts, defaces, disfigures, or perforates, or unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, or Federal Reserve bank, or the Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt unfit to be reissued, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both.”

Photo Credit: Tax Credits

Geez. And I thought the penalties for littering were bad.

I could talk for hours on title 18, which has to do with every law regarding every criminal activity ever, but that will suffice for now. I mention this law solely because it has to do with the main reason I made this post in the first place, little things I call money memos. What are they exactly? Well, allow me to elucidate with an example.

Author's Photo
Author’s Photo

I’ve collected these little works of art over the past year of working with my company’s cash. And every once in a while, I’ll come upon a piece that tells a story. These stories vary from the sweet and cute to the disturbing and horrifying. This piece could go either way. I can see a mother leaving a sweet note on her son’s lunch money, or a scary, controlling overly-attached girlfriend remind “Robert” constantly of her presence. And who wrote “stop the lies”? Stop the lie that she loves Robert? Something else? A government conspiracy? Who knows? I call these currency enigmas “money memos,” and I know it’s a catchy alliterative term, so feel free to use it in conversation, free of charge.

Each time one of these uniquely vandalized bills passes through my hands, I don’t just see a felony- I see the lives of those who decided a dollar bill was the best way to communicate their message. If you think about it, it’s kind of a weird medium. They’re already filled with text, they’re dark in color and ink doesn’t always show very well, and you don’t have much space to work with. Why choose a dollar? That is what interests me.

Though it may be a crime, these money memos are permanent little missives that get passed around to thousands of people, possibly all over the world. So many have seen them, and so many more will. What determines what a person will write on them? Do they write something with the intention of it being seen by a multitude of people? If that is the case, do they weigh what they’re about to write carefully, knowing that it will be a lasting testament to their mood in that exact moment? Will they write something beautiful? Will they write something hopeful and uplifting, inspiring all who see it?

FIVE (never give up)
Author’s Photo

Or will it be something written in a drunken stupor that caters to our more… base nature?

ONE (your ass...)
Author’s Photo

That, my friends, is the question I will always be in search of an answer for.

One thing is for sure: I don’t think I’ll ever run out of money memos in violation of Title 18, Chapter 17, Section 333 of the US Code. And I hope I never do.

My First Challenge

“The only victories which leave no regret are those which are gained over ignorance.”                               Napoleon Bonaparte

As I write this at 1:00 in the morning, having played around for a few hours with the various features of this website, it’s truly hit home how little I know about this medium. I’ve dabbled in web design before (on a very superficial level), but it seems that managing something as simple as a blog where almost everything is already done for me is quite a formidable task. The amount of customization at my fingertips is indeed quite impressive, however as I don’t have the know-how to use it all, it means nothing to me. It’s quite frustrating to know that there’s so much I could do- if i wasn’t utterly ignorant of how to do it.

Despite the unsettling blow to my ego I am certainly not discouraged- far from it. I am now motivated to show this site who’s boss, and plan to figure out each and every thing this blog is capable of. After having considered myself a master of technology for so long, I would be remiss to give up after the first day. After all, I’m writing this blog to learn, and the less I know now the more I can learn later. I’ll try to remind myself of that as I move forward, and keep from letting any frustration get the better of me.

Just One of Millions of First Posts in the Blogosphere

I’ve been thinking about creating a blog for a good while now, and seeing my sister find a rewarding creative outlet with her own has finally pushed me to flex my own blog-writing skills. If I have any remains to be seen, but I think a blog will be an interesting project for me to work on and practice designing. I suppose the reason I deliberated so long over whether to make a blog is mostly due to the fact that I have no idea what I’d write about. Sure, it’s easy to say “Oh, just make it like a diary” or “make daily updates about your adventures” but when it comes down to it, I’m a less-than-interesting guy whose last diary entry ever made was in August 2012, and who struggled for a good five minutes to do the simple task of inventing a URL for this site. Still, I’d like to have practice with blogging and perhaps now that I have a means of easily writing and publishing my thoughts, I’ll discover I have more to talk about than I initially thought.

Another factor in my creation of this blog is one of my college courses, a Computer Information Systems class where I’ll be spending a lot of time creating, designing, and writing websites. I figure if I practice with the most basic of website creation tools (this site) it certainly won’t hurt my understanding of the more complex aspects of this type of thing. A couple of the goals I’ve made in the creation of this blog are:

  • To practice and improve my writing ability,
  • To learn some basic background knowledge on how sites are created,
  • To read other blogs and learn from the more experienced,
  • To keep up regular posts at least through the Spring 2015 Semester, and finally
  •  To figure out how to manage Bulleted Lists better, because this took a while to do!

Hopefully over time I’ll become better at expressing interesting things I do or think, and will be able to articulate them better as well. Maybe I’ll regret having such a lengthy and difficult URL/site name too (incidentally it’s one of my favorite Latin phrases: “Fame comes too late to the dead“) but for now it will suit my purposes just fine. Here’s hoping I can keep up with regular posts and that they don’t bore anyone (including myself) to tears. We’ll just have to wait and see.